a new year is coming. but is it a new year or just another day? i like the idea of a whole new year all clean and fresh, laid out before me like a starched white shirt. it smells of possibility. anything can happen.
but, honestly, i feel that way every day. every day is new. and because of that, i never make resolutions for the new year. i'm pretty tough on myself. when i speak my mind (which i do a lot but still less than i used to) i sometimes will berate myself. and when i don't speak my mind, i will also berate myself. i am very critical of myself and constantly think of ways to be a better human being. without a doubt i am an enormous work in progress. it is not about perfection but direction. i'm always working on being a better mother, wife, friend, human being. january first doesn't change that for me.
still, having said all that, there is that fresh white shirt, all starched and clean, laid out on the bed of life. what kind of shirt will it be? will it have pockets? french cuffs? will it have a tiny pink and red flower embroidered inside the neck just for me to see? is my metaphor losing you?
i'm wondering about what the year will hold. the surprises that will come. the special moments. the unexpected aha breathtaking moments that will long be remembered when 2009 is just a shred of a dust rag instead of that lovely shirt.
it is possible to dream but it is far better, in my opinion, to work for the dreams by laying the foundation to make them all happen. you will surely learn the value of your dreams if you work diligently to achieve them. and i know that to be a better painter (one of my dreams) i have to paint a LOT more. which means i have to do something else much less. i have to work at being a better painter by painting, not by reading a magazine about painting or by going to the museum or talking to friends. i have to actually get my ass in the chair with the brush in my hand and paint. all those other things may fuel my desire to paint but they will not make me any better. hard work do it. remember that when you are reviewing your goals and resolutions later in 2009 and if you fall short, ask yourself if you put in the work. don't skimp on the work.
i hope that the new year will bring you all much joy. i hope that you can spend time being silent and filling your spirit so you can tackle new challenges. i wish for us all much patience and tolerance with ourselves and with one another (especially for all the moms of little children AND big children). i see my actions daily reflected back to me in the behavior of my children and it isn't always a positive experience. but i am encouraged to know that i have a new day to try harder, to be a bit more gentle or clear or joyful the rest of the day.
i hope this is a year of good health. i wish for all my friends and family a year of pain-free joints, cancer-free bodies, and minds that can remember everything very clearly. it seems we all promise ourselves to eat better and exercise more in the coming year. and we do this every year. i don't want to set myself up for failure with one more thing i SHOULD do so i'm going to keep trying to do my best and know that there will be chocolate involved somewhere along the way. i can't completely kid myself about who i am. but there will also be plenty of broccoli and hiking in the year, too.
i hope in 2009 we all find someone to hold our collective hands and be insightful and true. is there anything better than a friend who understands us and loves us in spite of ourselves? i hope everyone has someone in their life who looks out for them and really wants to know how it is with them, a true friend.
happy new year! happy new day!
now...what do you wish for?
what do i wish for? i life where i find the love and friendship of you and other family and friends i'm blessed to have in my life. i wish for strengh of heart as well as purity of heart, to accept all that life deals out to me and others without bitterness, a grateful spirit to accept every fleeting moment as a prayer (and on the more day-to-day level: i hope to be more organized and disciplined when it comes to cleaning, cooking, paying bills and anything resembling a bill or tax form which i need a calculator for, to learn the hard lesson of letting go, letting go, letting go...in the form of posessions, relationships that have run their course, and when people i love die.
like you, i don't make big resolutions for the new year - every moment is fresh and new, every day the sun rises and we get to try again. but i do enjoy this time to reflect about the direction i'm moving (or not!) tipping my champage glass to you my sweet friend, cheers (clink)
xo
Posted by: katie | December 30, 2008 at 08:30 PM
Our wishes seem similar, but at the moment I am really struggling with the above mentioned "actually get my ass in the chair" problem. I perhaps need a kick in that ass?? But I will definitely have some 2009 goals along that line. The chocolate and the broccoli don't sound bad either.
Posted by: pamq | December 30, 2008 at 09:31 PM
i always look forward to the nice clean shirt the new year brings... this year, i wish for balance. what i know about me is that i'm oten the type of girl who jumps in with both feet, totally immersing myself in the "_____" du jour (fill in the blank with job, art project, daughter's school, community event, art retreat...), often to the demise of my eating habits, family time, excercise, pet care, house work, etc. I've been told I'm addicted to chaos, by professionals and amateurs alike, so balance is not comfortable to me. Well, I'm just not willing to accept that anymore. Balance is attainable and this is the year I choose to identify myself as something other than a chaos addict. i know i'll still be the girl who jumps in with both feet, i like that about myself... i just need to remember to come up for air and take a look around, now and again.
Thanx for prompting me to think about this Kelly belle. I've had yet to do so but am glad i did. Now to think of steps i will take in fulfilling this wish... how to make it my truth and reality... Hhmmmmmm.
Posted by: Mija | December 30, 2008 at 10:57 PM
peace, without and within...a chance to catch my breath before having to run again...to show forgiveness to myself and others...that I will remember (and possibly teach others through my example) that people are more important than things
Posted by: Cindy Ericsson | December 31, 2008 at 07:05 PM
p.s. -- bought your book today and I'm loving it!
Posted by: Cindy Ericsson | December 31, 2008 at 07:21 PM
Such a wonderful wish-filled post ! I wish that your wishes comes true for you, for me and for our world ! (That's kind of like the kid saying "She took my answer." in the classroom isn't it ? )
My one true wish for myself is that I learn to be gentler with myself and to strive towards being a better me with a huge load of self-love surrounding me...
Wishing you many painty moments in 2009...
Posted by: kim mailhot | January 01, 2009 at 06:22 AM
Beautiful post, dear Kelly. I echo your sentiments, especially the one about more tolerance and understanding. Our planet is desperate for that. And of course I'm very happy we'll soon have a smart new president. Wishing you a new year filled with love, light, joy, good health, kindness and prosperity - and endless possibilities! xoxox
Posted by: Tara Bradford | January 01, 2009 at 06:27 AM